Hymas: Skiing, pain, broken bones, and life’s balance takes a hit

I was on the right path. I had time to work in private and professional life. I had been to the doctor and got my hormones balanced. I was gearing up to start my training program for the next half-marathon. I was finally getting a taste of a more balanced life.

Then I went skiing.

We go skiing on Saturdays as a family. We have season passes. One more way to be balanced: fun with my children. This weekend it all changed.

I was on the second ski run of the day. And it was on the bunny hill of all things! My daughter fell behind me and I look back and tried to stop. While trying to stop my knee went “snap, crackle, crackle, crackle, pop!”

I screamed in pain. I have never felt such horrible pain. I have shattered my shoulder, was scheduled to have brain surgery, been bit by a brown recluse spider and experienced shingles. Nothing in my lifetime had ever hurt as bad as this.

In that moment of pain, I silently said “Why?” And then words came into my head at that moment; an answer that is still so clear: “This will be good for you.” The pain being so intense I just cried. I couldn’t even help myself.

My daughter, a trained lifeguard, was my first, first responder. My boot and ski still attached to my now for sure at-least torn knee, I was stuck in an awful position waiting for others to help me.

I have spent most of my life working on being able to care for myself. However, there was nothing I could do. I needed help. And with the pain being so intense, that help from others was a welcome sight. The ski patrol removed my boot and ski and got me off the mountain. You know, in those first aid toboggans. You hate to see them on the mountain because you know somebody is really hurt, but man, was I glad to be in it.

I ended up on an ambulance headed to the Driggs hospital, and still the pain never stopped. X-rays, CAT scans, and moving my leg around hurt even with the hospital drugs. I kept thinking, “How is this going to be good for me?” The pain just would not stop.

And then the diagnosis: I broke my tibia in seven places right below my knee. So every time gravity pulled on my leg my knee was attached, but my leg and foot were not.

My ACL was still attached to my bone, but the bone wasn’t attached to anything else. I was going to need surgery. But that was OK. A broken leg, a couple days off work, maybe a couple weeks, this could be nice. I was starting to understand how this could be good for me. Little did I know that this was just the beginning of one of my hardest-fought battles.

I’ve always believed that beauty starts with a smile, but I couldn’t manage one. It wasn’t just the intense pain, but that I was suddenly being very selfish, focusing only on my pain and need for help with everything. It seems the beginning of that “good for me” promise was to lose the comfortable balance in my life. It was very humbling.

And the rest? Click here for the continuation of the story.